Autonomy - how do you feel when you lose control?

It can't be avoided. When working in a team situation, the individual players lose a bit of autonomy.

Autonomy is that sense of control and ability to make choices which is intricately connected to people's feelings of freedom and their ability to handle stress. Funnily enough, in this game of life, autonomy is often a matter of perception.  Do people "think or feel" that they have the power to choose?

Crazy rat experiments showed that inescapable stress can be highly destructive, whereas the same stress interpreted as escapable is significantly less destructive. (Donny et al, 2006). The difference in some rat studies was life and death (Dworkin et al, 1995). (My stress level goes up just thinking of the trapped rats!!) Think Hotel California:

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
"Relax, " said the night man,
"We are programmed to receive.
You can check-out any time you like,
But you can never leave! "

When people experience a loss of autonomy, they feel threatened, hemmed in, pushed around, bullied... None of which are reactions that would help teams to work collaboratively, build relationships or leverage creativity and innovation.  Often policies that exist in our systems set boundaries that can make people feel like they are losing control. Examples include an inflexible work week, shared and depersonalized work spaces, directives, and micro-managing.

Working in community, or in other collaborations, there is the dance of give and take - so a loss of autonomy lays persistently beneath the surface of partnerships and group efforts. So how can you, as collaborator and community builder, help to diminish the AVOID responses of people when they feel like they are losing autonomy?

Our number one, best tactic is to ensure everyone's strengths shine. When we are acknowledged and honoured for how we can contribute to something using our strengths/passions/greatness, there is a much better chance of being ok with others doing the same...even when it means WE don't get to have as much say.

Example: if your schtick is coming up with poetic and powerful words and the project allows you to contribute your best writing, you are going to be a little softer when someone else brings images that maybe you would have done a bit different. When you have a chance to shine and also see how other people shine when they have their chance...the control is shared more peaceably.

Here are other great ways to bring more autonomy (and the perception of autonomy) to groups:

• self-directed learning
• seek creativity through flexible and open processes
• ask lots of questions and seek clarity constantly
• have decision making processes that work towards or embrace consensus
• level the playing field when different partners have more power (both real and perceived)
• identify the key pieces of the work and how we are all needed and important to the issue
• an escape route!

Next week - Relatedness, SCARF brain-based engagement and the 4th (of 5) domains of social experience.

photo by indi.ca